tiistai 1. joulukuuta 2015

The muscle of the soul


Perhaps I can share a personal story about it.

It was sometime last year that I was home alone lying in bed. I had already had a go at meditation and while at it, had some pretty incredible experiences.

This time I thought I'll just try to relax my body as much as I could. Of course I had relaxes it before, like when we are kids and at school we would lay on the sport hall's floor and be told to relax while the teacher told us a story in a soothing voice. But this time even more.

And how do you relax your body more than you've ever relaxed? I put effort into it. It sounds contradictory, but that's the way it felt. Perhaps like when you've clutched your hand in a fist for a minute and when you start to open it, it feels like you've got to use force to pry your fingers open.

Going deeper into this "forced" relaxation I felt ..something in the middle of my pelvis. It started off as a sort of a gentle rising feeling, but soon intensified into waves and waves of what felt like pure panic roll through my body. Such was the force that my arms curled up into an involuntary spasm. Now if I had not had an inclination on what was going on, I would have certainly called the paramedics to come and pick me up in the middle of a stroke.

I'm certainly happy that I didn't and managed through some twenty minutes of it. Right after it felt like a muscle, of which existence I was previously unaware, had relaxed in my pelvis. It really felt like it had been contracted for all my life. I could feel my lower back had opened up and even the direction my feet were pointing had changed, my toes now pointing more forward than before.

Sometime later, I was again lying in bed alone. Doing the same kind of relaxation. Again a sensation appeared in the middle of my pelvis. It was different this time however. It felt warm and light and good. It didn't come rushing up in waves, but slowly made its way upward what felt like through my spine. Perhaps like how a snake would move.

There I was, a skeptic, materialist and an absolute believer in western worldview's superiority, lying in bed and feeling this incredible energy travel from my pelvis through the spine to my head. In the head the energy appeared to intensify in the middle, making my forehead tingle at the same spot.

As the energy kept growing and seemed to fill every single cell in my body, I knew deeply, coupled with everything else I had experienced, that this was not going to go down well with how I viewed the world.

"Ok" I thought, "So it's all true. All the talk about the chakras and the kundalini and the third eye, its all true. What does this mean? I'm an intelligent person and I've received a twenty year education in one of the most highly regarded education systems in the world and I have not heard a single word about a fucking dormant energy system in the body?!"

"That the root of this energy system can become clogged up with fear and this will feed all these fearful and negative thoughts to my head and prevent the system from operating normally?! That my consciousness is not limited to my body, but that my body is immersed in my consciousness?! What the actual fuck!"

And so it came down, all the meticulously built concepts about how the world operated, all the beautiful fortresses of information I'd spent thousands of hours building, collapsed like cardboard cutouts on a stormy night.

Yeah, it took a while to recover and there is a tendency to go to the other extreme, as has possibly been the case with myself, but that's ok. Really, as always, the middle road is the way to go. Western science has done fantastic things for humanity, but the east got the spirituality right. Now for these two to combine, humanity would be a thousand times better for it.

Ps. and this is not far, methinks ;)


Continued in part two: http://olemisenmiellyttavakeveys.blogspot.fi/2015/12/the-muscle-of-soul-part-two.html

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